Life Unemployed - The Changes I've Noticed in Myself this Year

As I say goodbye to 2009 and prepare for a new year I couldn't help but noticed the changes I've gone through since my life was turned upside down in January. It's kind of strange in that after spending the previous years believing I found a job I sort of enjoyed. I said "sort of" because I really wanted to get into gaming more and enjoyed working at the newspaper even less. Well. I still liked working at the newspaper, just enjoyed working with certain people there less and less.

I have worked with great people to include awesome supervisors and co-workers, the office often changed as people come and go. When the last of these great people left for whatever reasons they had, I found myself working with co-workers and supervisors using cut-throat tactics "to save their sorry asses." Though there are still a few I can honestly say are hard-working individuals with hearts of gold. I still found myself giving up weekends and evenings so this newly formed "girlfriend" click can have their group lunches at fancy restaurants with other "girlfriends" while I write the stories they didn't really want to write and over time I took the stories with odd hours just to get away from the office using my "comp" time to escape the nonsense. But I also experienced something that I never had to deal with before during my years there.

Having felt betrayed by someone I thought was a friend. But it was my fault for not seeing through the deception until it cost me my job.

When the major changes started taking place in 2008, I would often experience depression, sadness, exhaustion, feelings of being burnt-out, having my confidence shaken often and I even felt anger. The anger was mostly from being harassed daily by a certain co-worker who thought he was "god's gift to women" and though I complain, it was laughed off and was told I was being too dramatic.

But that is now in the past, I keep in touch with those great people I had the honor of working with or met during one of my many assignments and enjoy their words of wisdom and encouragement even today.

In my mind I have cast those who did me harm during my employed years into the dark reaches of hell where they can hang their coats of deceit upon the horns on their heads and rest their cloven hooves in the fiery paradise they made for themselves and have kept moving forward never to look back ... ever. A friend recently ask if I would ever consider going back to that office if they called me. My reply was not only "No" but "HELL NO!" I'd soon spit in their eye and walk away before returning to that nightmarish job again.

After the bout with illness resulting from depression and extreme sadness I have taken to blogging at the request of my good friends and have now found peace as well as a few job offers here and there. And while I'm still unemployed, I have hopes there is a job out there for me.







But there is a whole new set of changes I've noticed that took place this year. Now that the demons are cast aside I have found myself becoming the people that once annoyed me. For example:

1) When shopping for groceries, I have become the customer rifling through a wallet filled with coupons at the checkout counter. I have learned to shop the "Store-Brand" products to save money and when available bought groceries in bulk. Even if I didn't really need the 9 extra TV dinners, if it says 10 for $5 ... put it in the cart. Bought cereal in the giant bag beneath the name-brand ones and store them in tupperware containers. Select items I have coupons for first, then go back and get the items I need.

2) Gaming. Used games are just as good as the new ones and often much cheaper. Trade any and all games I know I won't ever play again for the ones I really want. Reserve the game I really want months in advance and slowly pay it off when I can.

3) Bills. Pay at the start of the month regardless of when its due.

4) House Cleaning. Prioritize everything throughout the week and do those chores in order. Starting with vacuuming, sweeping and mopping on Sundays. Trash or store unnecessary things around the house like old magazines, photos, craft projects and memorabilia I don't even look at anymore. Air the house out on Wednesdays because nothing beats fresh air even in winter. Bulk cooking on Saturdays for the following week and storing them in tupperware containers. That way if there's a day I don't feel like cooking, I can just toss it in the microwave and viola! Dinner in 5 minutes or less.

5) Clothes shopping. I have become my mother when it comes to shopping for clothes. I tug, pull and search every inch of all shirts, pants or shoes for loose threads, rips and stains before considering it for purchase. Bargain-rack clothes and shoes are just as good as the name-brand clothing on the regular shelves.

6) Discount Stores Galore. No longer afraid of buying clothes from places like Roses, Big Lots, Treasure Mart and Thrift Stores. Even if you find yourself deciding which Coffeemaker/Toaster Oven/Muffin Warmer kitchen accessory with a timer to buy. The one with the Rusty Wallace or Dale Earnhardt NASCAR Number painted on it. (True story if you don't believe me go to Treasure Mart on Hope Mills Road.)

As I look up at the sky past all those stars and planets and whatever else is floating up there. I can't help but wonder what the new year will bring, if anything I hope to have a new job soon and maybe find new adventures in life waiting for me around the corner.

Life Unemployed -- What's sitting next to you at the ESC?

Finally a break through, I'm called to the unemployment office to take a typing and spelling test to qualify for a job they want to recommend me for. But before we get to that let me explain, getting up at 8 a.m. has become harder since .. there really isn't a goal other than waking up in the morning these days. But I managed to get up at 6 a.m. and even ate breakfast.

God I love Starbucks in the morning. I miss Starbucks. Okay. Back to the story.

It was an interesting day at the Employment Security Commission's Office, but not because of the test ... no. Much like the job fair, it was the other people waiting to file claims, take tests or even use the job board computers. How entertaining? Well.

Let me put this in YouTube videos to explain. First up. The mismatched Asian American girl faking the cute Asian behavior we often see on television to win the clerks over. Ok. I'm no fashion queen, but School girl outfits are cute when they are worn by little girls, much like the singer in this video, an adult woman wearing a school girl outfit with an outrageous tan makes her look more like a guy. Except in this video the lead singer really is a guy.



Next person to sit near me ... I don't really think he came in to find a job or file a complaint. I think he really is one of the homeless people looking for a warm place to take a nap, so he doesn't really count. But the woman and her two screaming children do. So coming in at number two is a woman wearing more fur than Wookies at a Star Wars convention. Seriously. If it weren't for the screaming we would have never known she had kids. Even the homeless guy went outside to sleep in peace. I'd listen to my MP3 player if it would drown the screaming out, but I have learned no matter how high you turn the volume you will still hear the screaming. Sigh.



Once the kids have settled, they were all over the place like a Gremlin infestation.



Wow. That's enough to keep you entertained while you wait. But just before I was called in the next two were just as entertaining. The smooth guy who thought he could smooth talk to the front of the line only to find out ... he can't file in NC if he lost his job in Virginia but plays it off and tries to smooth talk the lady clerk anyways. Sheesh. All he had to do was ask to use the job board computers, that's open to the public.



The last person that sat near me before I went in to take my tests was the guy still in denial that he lost his job. Believe me, I was riding the denial train for awhile myself. So I know where he's coming from. He kind of reminded me of the sadness I went through before I came to my senses and kept hunting for a job and any gigs that paid like my game blogs. Even in the virtual world on my PlayStation HOME, I meet hundreds like me still continuing to stay connected and out looking for jobs and any paying gig they can find. I do my best to help them and they in turn help me by sending me the links of potential employers and paid gigs available online. Hoping that together we can find jobs for everyone regardless of what niche' they're looking for.



Well after my test I was given the recommendation, I had the interview Monday and await news from this insurance company on Wednesday. So I'll let you know then if I'm employed or unemployed.